Let You Go
by The Smiling Shadow
Summary: Eddie Brock and the Symbiot, who lived as two in one. But as the years waned on Eddie remembered what it was like to be human, and as he began to die he left the Symbiot to go on, but it chooses on its own that it cannot do that.


It was hard to let you go, and he hopes you know this. He can recall in his youth being this afraid of you. When you first came to him that familiar sense of fear. When you first came to him and held him and took him. When you enveloped him in your embrace, spreading over him with the intention of giving him the world. Remember how he screamed, how he fought, and you spoke but he could not understand. He saved you didn't he? Rejected, dying, suffocating, your entire being, being torn a part little by little, and there he was.

Like fate there he was. He was younger then, frightened, inexperienced, angry. He had been pushed to his limit and there you were to push it farther. The bells rang that night, when the Spider tore you from his heart, and the one being that had ever shown you empathy abandoned you for death, and there he was. Abandoned just like you, afraid just like you, suffocating on that thing called life just like you.

You both would have died if not for that night, where dying you fell upon his skin and wrapped your black fingers around him.

"Help me!" You said in a silent tongue. "Living body, full of warmth, help me!"

He was just a boy back then, like the Spider was. There was a familiarity there and you couldn't help yourself. And for a moment you thought it was the Spider, for a brief moment there was joy in wherever your heart is, you thought it was Peter, you thought he'd come back for you. But it was not the Spider, it was a boy so much like him. And the boy fought you, he screamed and thrashed, but you knew you were about to save both your lives. You took his flesh first and then went down his throat into the very core of his being. You entered that body that so many or so dependent on. Put yourself in the flesh, the muscle, the very bones and blood. You put yourself in his heart and as it beat it gave you life. You synced to his very frequency and you entered his mind and you became a part of him, that boy that scared little boy.

And you stood silent before the boy who laid on the ground in his own mind. You stood in front of him as a black humanoid with white eyes, and you spoke without making a mouth, and he wept and wiped his tears as he rose to meet your eyes.

Humans live their lives so separate from one another, even the Spider was distant from the one he most loved, the woman with red hair. He laid there in the same bed with her and you within him, and you knew, you could feel, despite them being side by side they were worlds away. Humanity you had observed knew not how to live together. Living with another being inside the boy scared him. His heart was not used to giving life to two beings, his lungs not used to breathing for two, and the mind not used to sharing its thoughts.

And in those first moments you met.

"Who are you?" The boy asked.

"Eddie Brock." You said.

"What?" Eddie Brock asked.

"That is your name."

"Yeah…it is."

The boy's eyes shook with confusion and he rose up at your emotionless black face.

"What is your name?" He asked you.

You titled your head.

"I don't have a name." You told him.

And then you showed him, the life you'd lived up to that point. You showed him how you fell from the sky in search for another being to share your life with, for that was your nature, that was your purpose for living. You showed that boy Peter Parker's face, and what you did with him. You showed that boy all you knew about Peter, which was practically everything, you showed the boy what you gave Peter, what Peter gave you, and how he abandoned you there then, for dead. And you felt the anger inside the boy grow, and so did yours. For the boy had hate in his heart, for the same person you did, Peter Parker, Spider-man the man who had ruined both your lives.

Like a scorned lover you engulfed that boy in anger towards Peter Parker and with an open heart did he accept it.

"I will give you, everything I gave him, and more." You told this boy.

"And we will be one." The boy said with enthusiasm, and you nodded. "Then I will give us a new name!"

"A name?" You asked. "I do not have a name."

"No! Now we do. I am Eddie Brock, and we…We are Venom!"

Venom.

Poison.

An alien thing that enters the body and begins to destroy it. You liked it. It showed more of that human creativity you lacked. You enjoyed that name.

He was so much younger then. A child you see. Naïve. He did not fully comprehend what he was accepting in giving you his self. Humans do not understand the idea of two in one, they hold precious their individuality which separates them so far from another. Humans, such lonely things, but willing to be lonely for some reason. Your motives were good, for you merely wanted to help this lonely boy, who even lacked the love and strength of Peter. But he did not understand. He did not know. He was young and needy, he would have accepted anything at that point.

You were both young, one can suppose. Both abandoned children seeking out another.

You fought that Spider who had so ruined your lives. Together your wrapped his fragile neck, your hands over his hands trying so hard to break those bones of his. You were struck down many times together, you lost together.

And in the quieter moments, where the hate was nearly forgotten, his heart beat for you, and you rested beside him.

But then the boy inside of you, underneath your flesh was still that boy. Still that human that once dreamed of what his life would had been. He was once a child you see, who had a father and a mother, and friends, these things were not so easily forgotten as you had hoped. You were almost insulted, were you not worth these things? You looked upon that boy's childhood, the horrors he was shown even at such a young age. He told you once, he loved taking pictures, and he wanted so much to be a photographer.

He told you that once "I loved Spider-man, he gave me hope." he loved Spider-man, for

And you replied, "I loved him too, he gave me hope too."

Humans are not like you. For as the years went by, the boy's hate waned, he no longer wished this anger to be with him that you had forced upon him. He did not blame you, but he just wanted more. And like any relationship, there were compromises. His heart grew good, and all he wished was for acceptance once more.

"We can be like him." He said. "We can be better than him."

And so you went with him, through the city streets that he owned, and you took all that he missed while he was too busy with the Goblin man, the Octopus man, the Lizard man, the Fish-Bowl-On-His-Head man as Eddie called him. You went to the streets to those who called his name, and instead you came. You once saved a woman from a mugger, and Eddie was so happy. He was so overjoyed by his good deed, it had been too long since he had done one. And you went with him to give the woman back her purse, but she screamed and ran.

You felt Eddie shudder then, sadness grew within him, and you felt his own self hatred. Humans are not like you. They have a natural sense, a natural desire to be accepted. For they lack relationships like this, two in one, acceptance is as close as they come. And despite you being there beside him, you are not human. You have no skin to touch, no voice to truly be heard, you have no hands that can hold, no soul that he could find to be shared. They have a natural desire to not always be hateful and hated.

That was when you began to become afraid. You did not want to be abandoned again, not again.

As he slept you kept watch, and you saw the Spider swinging around his city. And you wanted so much to go and grab his skull, and smash it until you saw those brains. But you felt Eddie's soft heart beat sleep within you, and you did not dare to move.

The years went by, redemption came slowly, vengeance came now and then.

Eddie attempted to teach you aspects of humanity.

"Our tongue is perfect for ice cream." He said.

And he grinned and poked your teeth.

But what scared him the most, is that one day, he had run out of things to teach you, for he could not remember any more.

Together you had a child, who Eddie named Carnage in a fit of hate. The months before its birth Eddie mused on a human child of his this was around the same time the Spider had a still born, you supposed babies were on Eddie's mind. But you felt a deep need for a child, something once again human. Eddie mused on what they could do with this child, but you spoke of it with hate and anger. You wished it gone from you, this alien thing inside you.

He laughed and said "How do you think I feel?"

You heard the despair in his mind.

Your son was a monster.

That you wanted only to kill.

At the end of it all, Eddie was tired.

The thing that scared him most after it all, was that he was beginning to forget what his face looked like. He looked in a mirror and was horrified to see his aged face. He had not known that much time had gone by. And he looked upon his own face, and he saw a man, but felt he was still that scared boy.

Where had his life gone?

What had he missed?

Too long had he worn you over him, a second flesh above his own. Too long had he used your voice as his, your white eyes as his. Too long had he kept your white spider above his heart. He saw his face, his human face, and was scared. He looked back upon his life and asked what had they done? What had they done with those years? He had only destroyed, he had not created, he had not left his mark on the world. The world would remember not his face but that of you, and your white eyes, your black face, your long tongue, and sharp teeth.

He'd almost forgotten he was human. And he remembered his life. He remembered how humans woke up in the morning and brushed their teeth, and showered, and ate food. He remembered how they worked for a living and bought food and furniture. He remembered they made small talk and sought out one another. He cried out how far had he gone? How far had you let him go?

"But we are Venom." You said.

"I am Eddie Brock!" He yelled.

And he wondered how old he was, and cried again "When the hell is my birthday!?"

He wanted to be human again he told you.

He did not want to be Venom anymore.

But you are not human. You are Venom. That is what you are, you cannot stop being that.

And you knew, you just knew he was going to abandon you again. After all those years, after all you'd given him, your strength, your power, your mind and body and soul he was going to abandon you again, and you remembered how Peter tore you into pieces and the bells, the horrible bells. You grew afraid of Eddie who inside you did not want to do nothing.

Then you felt something horrible inside him. Something alien. Cancer. And you held him close and you told him and you took out as much as you could but it continued to come again and again, and you tried again and again to take it out. It was too small though, it would resurface and you would be too late.

"Just let it happen." He told you. "Just let it happen."

No. Don't give up, you told him. I didn't make you like that!

And you saw as he was still that scared little boy you found long ago. You had not allowed him a life beyond those days, he had not known how to grow up. The courage, the nobility of Peter was lost upon this Eddie Brock.

You decided this was not the life you wanted to live.

So you left him, and he breathed for himself for the first time in a decade. He stumbled on his own legs, and felt the world crush him without your strength. His heart was however strong and diligent, again beating for only him. You were not going to be abandoned, you abandoned him. So he took you, and sent you away to someone, knowing you could take care of yourself.

He looked down at you, as your rested on his hand, not forming around him, but simply staying there. He looked and saw his life, and you saw yours. You sat upon his hand and faintly heard the heartbeat you had grown dependant on.

"Oh Eddie," you said in a silent tongue he could no longer hear. "It did not need to end like this."

You like to think he heard you.

Perhaps he cannot understand for he is human, and you cannot understand for you are not human.

But it was hard for him. He was scared. He was scared of letting you go. He did not know how to live without you, all this time, he had been with you, he had been Venom, he had forgotten how to be Eddie Brock. He just didn't know, but he was more afraid of dying with out at least trying to be himself again. He hoped you could understand that, but you were always you, and he knew that. But he somehow knew he could no longer help you, he was dying and you should not have to die with him, not now.

His only regret is that he was not able to teach you more.

You have spent your time with others now. New flesh and new minds, new heartbeats, but Eddie is not easily forgotten, the one who had supported you for all his life, rejected you for the hopes of his final days to be spent as a human being.

But this Scorpion man who has taken you as his own, though better than the last, is no Eddie Brock or Peter Parker. You sit with this man, bored of his mind that thinks so very small. And you too wonder, what has become of your life? Where once you started out so well, you were Spider-man's, and he was yours, you were closer than any red head would hope to be. And then you met a boy and you built a life with him, based on a common hate, that formed into something very different. But now look at where you have gotten yourself. Is this the life you were meant for? To be used only as a tool for the petty criminals? Your power, your strength is a gift, it is not a weapon to be used. It can be used for good or bad, and here we have the abuse of you.

This man doesn't even know you exist. This man can't even comprehend what you are even as you infest his mind. You toy with him because he bores you, you tell him to think happy thoughts just so you aren't forced to talk with him. Is this to be your life?

You who fell from the skies and possess all of what humanity only hopes for?

No, this petty thief, this Scorpion man, though he wishes Spider dead as you do, his mind is too small, and he does not care about you.

So you leave him, screaming for you to return.

"Now you talk to me." You say to him in a language he cannot hear.

And you traveled long and hard towards the heartbeat you were most familiar with, and you were concerned that it was so very faint. You rode upon the pockets of men, the tires of their vehicles, you climbed the building's concrete and you broke a hole in a window for you to slip through.

He was asleep in a bed, dying.

Like that day he saved you, like that day you were dying. You crawl up to him and wrap around him, feeling that heartbeat.

You will not let him die. For there is still so much to do. So much more to learn and to discover. There is so much hate in your hearts and so much love waiting to be felt. So you go to him once more and you will try again and again to save him for as long as it takes.

This is what you do for the one you love.

"I am here." You tell him.

---------------

As a budding filmmaker I pronounce Sam Raimi as my lord and savior.

I can't wait for what he's done with Venom.


End file.
